live with confidence


Do you desire to live with confidence,  then there is a sure way for you to follow.

Would you rather walk with your heads high or heads bowed?  You need to decide.

Confidence is a beautiful sight to behold, when you have mastered the art of building and maintaining your confidence despite any empowering situation you may encounter, then you have mastered something of high value.

If you have decided to walk with your heads high, read on to discover easy ways to raise your beautiful head in full confidence. I have carefully collated effective ways you can apply to gain everyday confidence, even when your heart feels shattered.

1. Know you are worthy.

Confidence starts inwardly radiating outwards; the first active step is believing you are worthy.

  • You are enough.
  • You are capable.
  • You have what it takes.

You need to groom confidence inwardly; when confidence blooms from the inside it is shielded from external factors.

If you flop, you still know you are worthy.

If you fail, you still know you are capable.  

If hard days or disappointing days stares you in the face, you stare back hard with an undefeated stance. Why? because you have groomed your mind to know the source of your worth and external factors cannot dare penetrate. You must see yourself beyond the language the world around you is speaking.

Check yourself. Check the stance of the heart. Do you think you are worthy? Rate yourself on a scale of 1-10.

If you fall below 7, then I need you to know this: Just by being alive, you are worthy.  You don’t need a 20 list of items to convince you.

Are you still breathing? You are worthy. Period

2. Desist comparison.

In simpler terms, do not compare.

A wise book says; a person who compares himself to another is unwise. Therefore, it becomes unwise to compare yourself to another. How would you feel if a friend loudly calls you foolish in front of your colleagues?

But guess what, when you compare yourself with another, you are declaring yourself unwise, you develop an unhealthy mindset that alters your confidence. Living with confidence every day requires you to desist from making comparisons every day.

Have you ever wondered why people only compare themselves to people above them and not those beneath them?

Understand that life is peculiar to a specific individual, each person’s story is unique to them, comparing makes you abandon your unfinished story and get distracted by another person’s story.

You cannot write your story when your focus is elsewhere. Ignore another person's story and write yours with focus.

Whenever you find yourself making a comparison, Recite these words: She that compares herself to another is unwise. Trust me, your brain rejects identifying as unwise, it is most likely to halt the comparison session abruptly.

3.  Replace negative self-talk with positive self-talk.

Do you know you listen to your own words more frequently than anybody else’?  

Now imagine the voice you listen to mostly only speaks negatively?

Most times, you complain about how your family or friends say the wrong things, you get upset by the choice of their words when in reality you should be upset at yourself. When you transform your self-talk positively, then you can easily live with confidence every day.

Words are energy, just like heat and light. Physics says energy is the ability to do work; this means the energy your words carry can affect your ability to work or not. For energy to have its full effect it must reach a threshold where it can perform its work.

Same with your self-talk, what good is permitting positive self-talk today and accommodating a river of negative self-talk the next day.

Your self belief is identified through the words you speak often to others and mostly to yourself.

Speak the right words to yourself continuously, build up the right energy- your mind is listening.

live with confidence

4. Dress up.

Yes, dress up. Sounds too easy right?

Of course, no sane person saunters around unclad.

Research says that people feel more confident about themselves by 30% when smartly dressed.  Dressing up isn’t throwing just anything on your body because it falls under the “cloth” category.

Dressing up means carefully picking up beautiful and quality clothes that suites your style and preference. Dressing up means being able to pair different dresses and accessories to radiate your style.

You don’t need to break the bank to dress up, start with what’s in your wardrobe.

People naturally walk more confidently when they feel good about their appearance. Invest in your style and don’t forget your shoes; it’s one of the first things people notice about you.

5. Check your posture.

Carry yourself, woman! A group of persons are walking by but your eyes get fixated on one person? Why that person and not the other?

When it comes to posture; people who know how to walk or sit confidently not only exude confident energy to others but also quicken their subconscious into perceiving them as confident even when momentarily their insides are shattering.

To live with confidence you must have a posture that exudes confidence: Walk with your head high and shoulders square, avoid slumping your back and slouching your shoulders like a banana.

Walk like you are wearing confidence as a royal purple rope laced in silk and emerald shiny buttons. How would you walk if you were royalty, say the queen? Walk that way- With confidence.


Additionally, a good way to build your posture is by exercising either yoga, swimming, biking or anaerobic exercises. These help to tone your muscles while improving your posture. This is one easy way to boost your self-confidence, use it.

live with confidence

6. Expand your knowledge bank.

To build self confidence you need to acquire knowledge. Knowledge when highly organized and applied is power. Say you were informed two weeks prior about a speech you had to deliver, and you spent days preparing thoroughly for the speech, making notes, researching, and practicing. etc

Can you compare how you’d feel on the stage when called up, to your heart race when you are suddenly called to make a speech on a topic you have zero knowledge about?  In the first instance, you are confident. In the latter, you fidget.

Naturally, people feel confident when they know what they know. Imagine a surgeon entering the theater shaking in fear or even fidgeting- Impossible. No experienced surgeon fidgets when it’s time to do what they know how, rather he steps in with confidence even assuring others. Simply because they know what to do once they step into the theater. Likewise, you become unarguably more confident when you know something well.

A child in class keeps stumping his feet calling out the answer to a question asked by the teacher continuously till the teacher acknowledges his answer. He knows the answer is 5, so he continues confidently till he is heard.

Likewise, when you have knowledge registered in your head you become naturally bolder and live with confidence in ease every day.

Building your knowledge bank may be tasking but worth it, having a stable knowledge bank at your beck and call is a sure way to build your self-confidence.

You do not buy gold with a penny.

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7. Spend time around other confident people.

I consider this a prerequisite, you become an average of the people you spend the most time with every day.

If an eagle must learn how to soar like an expert then it must fly with expert eagles who soar amid high winds. This is the basic rule of life; to become, you must be among people who already are. Psychologically, we subconsciously absorb behaviors or mannerisms from people around us.

Have you noticed how long time friends finish each other’s sentences? Or how you speak or react similarly to your friend? Be wise enough to maximize your ability to subconsciously pick up energy from people around you- be around great energy.

An easy way to build your self-esteem is by hanging around other confident people and allowing your subconscious to fulfill its job of pulling confident energy from others into you without you even lifting a finger.

Do you consider yourself lacking in confidence? Identify and hang around confident people. You do not need to search, the person is around the corner. Let their mindset, mannerism, and belief rub off on you and show you how to build self confidence.

You can also join these face book groups to keep you THINK CREATIVE COLLECTIVE AND FREEDOM HACKERS.

live with confidence

8. Even the best person is not a perfect human being.

A bit out of class with others, but it works because I use it every time I need to.

This is why I never struggle to find the right behavior when in a palatial setting or before any great person. I realize even the best is not perfect. Even the great, have their flaws and lack knowledge in a specific area. This means there is something you know that they do not.

So if you are faced with someone whose strength and ability you find intimidating remember they are not perfect, and they lack a piece of knowledge; and you, my friend are on your way building self confidence.

 Know what you know, expand it, and take your eyes off what someone else knows that you don't.Except you intend to improve yourself.  

So the next time you walk into a room of highly placed caliber of people, stamp it on your mind that you know something they don’t- even if it’s the fastest way to peel an orange.

9. Help others.

Non nobis solum nati sumus. (Not for ourselves alone are we born)

Marcus Tullius Cicer.

When was the last time a friend, family member, or colleague approached you for a little favour? When you helped them how did you feel? After they thanked and thanked you, how did you feel?

When you help people you tell your mind that you’re capable, you enforce a sense of satisfaction inwardly. You find confidence in helping,  in offering your hands regardless of how small- The cup of your hand holds enough food that makes the horse merry.  

Your sense of capability is increased when you see how capable you are to help another. To live in confidence, familiarize yourself with helping others.  If you are clueless about which of these guides to start with, start with number 9– Render help to someone close to you and expect nothing in return.

To get a confidence boost- help someone.

He who serves the most reaps the most.

Jim Rohn

10. Remind yourself of past successes, no matter how small.

I have made it a habit to document my wins, regardless of how little. On days when I don’t feel up to working or pressing on, I remember the wins I have had in the past and my motivation flows.

How do you maintain confidence when everything seeks your breakdown?

The graphical indication of life comprises ups and downs, hence it is expected if real life gives you ups and downs. When you are down, use your “up” moments to pull back up.

  • Recall goodness, recall blessings, recall achievements. Remind yourself that you have done something before and you are still capable of something even bigger.

I know this because I believe you are. Have you ever seen a Bamboo tree grow less sturdy than it was the day before? No! it never happens that way but it keeps blooming day after day. Likewise, you are meant to be better in your today and your tomorrow. Your yesterday is not your best day. Know this and know how to use your “up” moments to overpower those downs.

Be confident woman.

When your confidence wanes, give yourself a full dose of your “ups” and get right back on your track of confidence. Don’t waste time down, get back up.

live with confidence

Till next time

This guide is practical and easy, requiring no specialization to put into action. Without a doubt you need confidence to “do” in this present time; you need it, then you must get it and keep it. Building confidence every day is as easy as it gets. The good thing is that you do not need to have a billion dollars in your account to be confident.

You need a plan and now you have it, so use it!

I want you walking the earth with extreme confidence that fear did stare at you in wonder as you pass by. 

Get your confidence up woman!


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